Love your Mother Tongue

Few weeks before I happened to meet a friend’s relative who had come from Australia. Probably the local friends thought that I should meet him and arranged a meeting in a local pub. I knew that the person, whom I had not met before, hailed from a small village near Pondicherry in Tamil Nadu and is settled in abroad for lesser years than the number of years he had lived in India. As soon as we met, he started conversing in English with a thick accent. I was already told that he has forgotten ‘Tamil’ and speaks only in English. I do not hate speaking another language. But how could someone forget their mother tongue? During our one hour talk he behaved as if he never knew ‘Tamil’ and replied in English for every other question asked in Tamil. He has moved out of the country only in his late 20’s and he should be in his late 30’s now. How could someone forget a language within 10 or maximum 15 years, and behave strangely whenever we spoke few words in ‘Tamil’. If the children are born in a different country, where their mother tongue is not spoken and if they behave like this it makes sense. We can at least understand that they are not used to it. But I could not tolerate this. Let the mother tongue be any language. I could not believe that someone could forget his mother tongue after few years. I spoke about this, to his relatives, who are my friends and they said he never gets chance to speak in his mother tongue. He is married to a foreigner and the chances of speaking in mother tongue became less. I am not convinced.

I met another family in London. They were originally from Sri Lanka. The parents who are of my age, mostly spoke with me in ‘Tamil’. Their English is unpardonable. I used to wonder how they are unable to speak good English, in spite of living in this country for more than 10 years. At the same time, it was funny to see their daughter who is in University, always spoke to me in English with a thick accent. Her parents talk to her in ‘Tamil’ and introduced me in ‘Tamil’, but she was constantly speaking in English. The reason I am mentioning about this is because, she cannot say that she does not have chance of hearing or speaking ‘Tamil’. She could very well speak at least few words in ‘Tamil’ but she was constantly speaking in English.

The manner is if you are in a group, speak in the most common language, which is understandable for everyone in the group. I maintain this always while I am in a group. If I happen to be with four Indians, out of which 2 are from different state, and one from Tamil Nadu, I still try to speak in English. In case, if the other ‘Tamilian’ does not speak English as fluently and if he tries speaking in ‘Tamil’ with me, I reply to him in Tamil, and then translate it immediately to the other persons in case if they could not understand it. This is just common sense and good manner.

But why don't people understand even this and cause embarrassment to others? A gentle advice to those people is, please avoid doing this. Imagine there are two Russian colleagues along with you and speaking in Russian. Will you not be offended? You may wonder what they are talking, while having you with them. Just put you in others shoes next time and try to speak the most common language which everyone speaks.

Also, I have found that people who live in India, especially Chennai (including my relatives) talking to me and my children only in English when we visit on holidays. Even though we reply back in pure local Tamil, they constantly speak in broken English which is very embarrassing. Why? Should they not understand that we could speak the common language well, and continue conversation in our mother tongue? Last week one of my relative spoke over phone and said none of us in our family have changed. Personally, people need to understand that just because someone lives far away from the home land he will change a lot. People are all the same everywhere in this world. There are people who would love to know about our Mother tongue.

I had a British colleague who always approached me to write in a piece of paper his name, or his wife’s name and children’s name in Tamil and carried back home to show his family. There was an Irish colleague who grabbed my Lunch box if she saw any Potato Curry in it. There are many English colleagues who have always wanted to visit my family for a Vegetarian Curry and Rice. I still remember few years before, one of my team leader sent a mail to everyone in our team (20 of us) asking to vote, for a local English restaurant, or my House food for the Christmas party and I think majority of them who had tasted my home food earlier opted to visit my house for the Vegetarian food. Thanks to few young English girls in my team, who were concerned whether my wife could make food for 20 of us, and later spoke to my Team leader to cancel that option fearing for causing unnecessary stress to my wife. So sweet of them!

So, be whatever you are. It is interesting to know other’s language, culture and food. Please do not feel inferior. After all everyone in this world have to breathe Oxygen, have red blood, and walk with their legs. Let us not feel inferior about ourselves.

Love your language whichever it is!

(N.B- I am not fanatic, but would love people to be what they are. Somebody may ask, why then I am not blogging in Tamil? English suits me because I could reach many who may not understand my mother tongue. I may start one in Tamil which is getting delayed.)